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You are here: Home / Observations / How a guy can say NO gracefully

How a guy can say NO gracefully

September 6, 2011 By dschenk Leave a Comment

Scripture Text: Song of Solomon  2:8 -14     (22a, page 179)

Verses 8 – 14

The voice of my beloved!  Behold!  He comes, leaping over the mountains, bounding over the hills.  My beloved is like a gazelle or a young stag.  Behold!  He is standing behind our wall, gazing through the windows, peering through the lattice.  My beloved responded and said to me, “Arise, my darling companion, my beautiful one: come away.   For behold, the winter has passed.  The rain is over and gone.  The blossoms have appeared in the land.  The time of singing has come, and the voice of the turtledove is heard in our land.  The fig tree ripens in figs, and the vines in blossom give off fragrance.

Arise, my darling companion, my beautiful one: come away.  O my dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places of the cliff, let me see your form;  let me hear your voice; for your voice is pleasing and your form is lovely.

Below are some selections from other versions.  

Verse 8

[Vividly she pictured it] The voice of my beloved [shepherd]! AMP

Verse 14

In the secret place of the steep pathway, Let me see your form, NASB

Verse 14

let me see your face, let me hear your voice ESV

Verse 14

in the clefts of the rock, In the covert of the steep place, Let me see thy countenance, Let me hear thy voice; ASV

Verse 14

in the secret place in the mountain, let me see you. Let me hear your voice. For your voice is sweet, and you are beautiful. NLV

Verse 14

Show me your face. Let me hear your voice.  Your voice is so sweet. Your face is so lovely. NIRV

He comes to her house and invites her to come out on a spring day.  He asks to see her face, to hear her voice.  It wouldn’t make much sense for him to ask to see her face if he had already been ’embracing’ her.  Guys don’t tend to go backward.  Some guys use a little scoring system, first base, second base, third base.  They don’t all agree on what counts for each base, but once they have made it to a base, they expect to get back to it any time.  So why isn’t the guy pushing forward.   She certainly is interested.

I’m convinced that he is the one slowing things down.  He is the one saying wait.  Girls, when you tell a guy to stop, wait, not now, don’t… They can get confused, but they don’t get offended.  But in our society if the guy is saying that he better do it very carefully, because the girls will get offended.

Look at the way he leads her out into a public area.  He tells her she is beautiful and he loves to hear her voice.  If he was gay, or afraid, or didn’t know what to do, or wasn’t in to her, then no big deal.  But if he is interested, attracted and thinks she is special, and he can say no, he is showing some self control that will be very valuable in their relationship.

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Filed Under: Observations Tagged With: beautiful, face, fragrance, lovely, song of solomon, voice

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