I held him and would not let him go till I had brought him to my mother’s house, to the room of the one who conceived me. Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.
She is serious about him. This is the guy. This is the one she has been waiting for.
She is past all the random reasons to just have sex with someone. This is no longer someone. This is the person she wants to spend her life with, the person she wants to have kids with. Why is she saying wait?
Here are a couple of reasons:
there is a difference between what you plan to do and what you actually do. You plan to go to college and get a degree and work a specific job. But in the time it takes to do that plans can change. You plan to go on a diet and lose 20 pounds, to eat less and exercise more. But do you follow through on the plan and actually lose the 20 pounds. Good intentions are not equal to actions.
You decide to get married. But you don’t decide to get married one evening and then get married the next day. Why? The Wedding. You want the right people there, the right setting, the right dress. Then the perfect reception. Much planning and work go into that day. Take as much time with the sex and the relationship. Waiting has some great benefits. If you are willing to wait to have sex between the time of Will you marry me — Yes, until Until death do us part I Do and I Do, some important things are put into place. Once you are married you will worry occasionally about your spouse getting close to someone. What if they have Sex? What is they have a relationship? If you both were willing to wait during that time period, you will have much more confidence in your spouse to resist temptation. And you will have solid evidence that you can both resist temptation.
It is a good time to finalize your commitment. You can still back out without great damage to each other if you decide something isn’t right about the relationship. If you start sex early, then you can use the excuse Well I have to get married , rather than thinking it through — thinking thoughts like Do I really want to deal with the quirks in his personality all of my life. If you tell yourself yes you do, then you have gone into it with your eyes wide open. You can remind yourself of that in the years after you are married. It is just a great time to think it through and be sure of your commitment.