Reasons Why People Have Sex when they just do their own thing.
- It would allow me to “get sex out of my system” so that I could focus on other things
- I wanted to decrease my partner’s desire to have sex with someone else
- It would damage my reputation if I said “no”
- The other person was too physically attractive to resist
- I wanted to celebrate something
- I was seduced
- I wanted to make the person feel better about herself/himself
- I wanted to increase the emotional bond by having sex
- I wanted to see whether sex with a different partner would feel different or better
- I was mad at my partner, so I had sex with someone else
List from a survey by Dr Cindy Meston and Dr David M Buss
Compare to Advice in Song of Solomon
1) She has been flirting with a guy and she is getting turned on– WAIT
2) She is serious about a guy and is ready to make it permanent– WAIT
3) She is married, committed, has stated to the world that she is in a relationship with just this one guy. They have just had sex.
GO FOR IT. ENJOY EACH OTHER
4) After a fight they have made up Big Time, and she gave this advice.
I want you to promise me, O young women of Jerusalem,
that you will surely arouse, you will surely awaken love
when love pleases to awaken GLK
Not only Go for it, but SUPERCHARGE IT.
The advice in Song of Solomon leads to great sex that continues to get better as the relationship grows. The people in the survey can feel good about sex for a little while, but they aren’t building anything. It won’t make it to great.