WORKING HER PLAN 7:11 – 8:5
- Is it ok for the girl to make the first move?
- Is it ok for her to take the lead in lovemaking/sex?
- The brother, and mother references – Is she teasing him?
- What does she mean ‘old and new’ ?
- Explain why she has mandrakes.
- Is she repeating the warning that she gave twice before, or is this a warning to NOT hold back, but to go for it: 8:4
We left him ready to take action. She gave him a positive reply, but then came up with this offer:
Come, my beloved. Let us go out into the countryside. Let us spend the night among the henna blossoms. Let us rise early to the vineyards. Let us see if the vine has budded, its blossoms have opened, the pomegranates have bloomed.
Let’s go and look at your work. We will check out what is important to you. Let’s check out your work. What you were doing before the fight.
There I will give my love to you. The mandrakes send out their fragrance, and at our doors are delicious fruits, both new and old, which I have kept for you my beloved.
After we have looked at your work, then let’s make love — what I had in mind before the fight. This would show that she thought his work was important, and would make sure he wouldn’t get too wrapped up in his work this time. mandrakes were thought to improve fertility and increase sexual desire. Both old and new — we are going to do some things sexually that we have done before and then we are going to do some things I have in mind that we haven’t even done yet. In our society it would be like using this slang saying — I’m going to have sexual relations with you until your brains fall out of your head — it goes something like that.
He appears to agree with her plan and they start on their way. She has some things to say as they are walking along still out in public view.
Oh that you were like a brother to me, who nursed at the breast of my mother. Then if found you outside, I would kiss you, and no one would scorn me. I would lead you to the house of my mother. You would instruct me. I would let you drink from the wine — the spiced wine — from the sweet wine of my pomegranate.
They are on the way. She doesn’t want him to be distracted or lose interest. If you were my brother I could show open affection for you out in public — their society didn’t tolerate a couple showing public affection (in our society we aren’t crazy about it. We tend to say ‘get a room’). But their society did tolerate a brother and sister hugging or kissing in public. Notice how she added ‘who nursed (or sucked) at the breast of my mother’. She is implying that if society would allow it, I would be dissing you and you could be sucking on my breasts. Think she is keeping his attention? When she says drink the sweet wine from my pomegranate, some translations make it plural to imply breasts, Dr Glickman says that is isn’t plural. This would imply the golden triangle — I’ll let you decide. Either way she isn’t having a casual conversation. She is definitely enticing him with sexual suggestions. She goes on to talk about going to the house of her mother. Some translations say He instructs her, others that her mother instructs her. In our society the thought of going to his mother-in-laws house probably would have a damper on his attitude. But in their society the mother usually instructed her daughter about sex and how to please her husband. In our ‘open’ society mothers mostly avoid any discussion of sex with their daughters and certainly don’t talk about what kind of things she could do with her husband or how to do it. She is keeping his interest and his focus.
Then she speaks to the audience (gives us her thoughts):
Oh may his left hand be under my head and his right hand embrace me.
She uses this phrase again — it still seems like a wish to me. While she is busy keeping him heated up, it seems to be working on her too.
And then still her thoughts, or to the audience– no the young women haven’t caught up with them:
I want you to promise me, O young women of Jerusalem, that you will surely arouse, you will surely awaken love when love please to awaken.
I’m using this translation from Dr Glickman (google him, he has a site on Song of Solomon). He is the only person whom I have found to point out the differences in this warning — twice before the warning was exactly the same. This time the first part is changed — no mention of swearing by the does and gazelles. And then there is a slight change in the Hebrew (the language this was written in) that changes it in his opinion from a warning not to arouse love, to a warning TO AROUSE LOVE when it is ready to be aroused.
I think he is right. This fits with the section. In the fight, she held back sex because she was upset. Here, she is making sure she doesn’t do that. She is going at it full throttle. Some guys will be intimidated by a wife who takes the initiative, who makes the first move, and then fuels the fire.
Is she your equal?
Can she enjoy sex?
Can she take the lead?
If you are strong enough and confident enough this can be great.
If you are passive and insecure — this will scare you
Then the songwriter, the narrator says this:
Who is this coming from the wilderness, leaning on her beloved?
She is leaning on him in tht special way that a girl in love leans into her guy as they walk. If you’ve seen it you know that ‘lean’ that the girl does.
Then she talks to him and you know that she followed through on all the talking she had been doing:
Under the apple tree I awakended you. There your mother was in labor with you; there she was in labor and gave you birth.
They had sex outdoors, under an apple tree. she says that his mother either conceived him or gave birth to him under an apple tree. If this reference is to Bathsheba, it would not surprise me at all. David notice her while she was bathing on her roof. Bathsheba certainly wasn’t bashful about her body. At any rate, she made good on her promises. Girls you can tease a guy about when you will do somehing, but don’t tease him about IF you will do something.
Let me put it another way. If you lead a guy on so that you seem to be offering to have sex with him after he jumps through some hoops; but when the time comes you let him get started, and then want to say stop; don’t be surprised if bad things happen.
I’m not saying you deserve what you get
I’m not saying that he isn’t responsible for his actions
I’m saying you are on a slippery slope and it is easy to get hurt.
I’m saying that if you play with fire you can easily get burned.
I’m saying that is you play with fireworks, they can go off in a way you didn’t intend.