If he ever hopes to have a wife who will have respect for him
If he ever hopes to be the leader in their relationship
If he wants a wife who enjoys sex with him. A wife who can continually surprise him. A wife who will have sexual relations with him until his brains fall out of his head.
Guys: Who says yes or no or maybe later at work?
We call that person the BOSS.
How is it any different in dating?????
If you put the responsibility on the girl to be the one to say how far you can go with each other, you are making her take charge.
Later, if you leave the feeding and the changing and discipline and care of the children to her, then what is left for you to be in charge of?
It is like the bumper sticker I saw: daddy is in charge, right Mommy?
In the beginning, Adam and Eve were on their own. Eve was tempted to eat the only fruit that God said not to eat. Then she gave some to Adam and he ate it.
He was passive.
He just took it and ate it. When God questioned him, he tried to blame God –‘that woman that you put here’
God wasn’t impressed with that weak argument. He said that his punishment was that he was now going to have to work to provide food. It wasn’t going to be easy like it had been.
Then God gave Eve punishment — child bearing would be much more painful, and her desire would be for her husband. Women like to talk about the first part — you don’t know the pain we go through, you don’t understand. This second part about her desire being for her husband is often overlooked.
Guys, you probably thought that it was because you are so awesome that the girl has this desire for you, even when she knows you are doing dumb things. It is there even when you are abusive to her.
In Song of Solomon, twice the girl gives a warning to the other girls: don’t awaken love before it is time for it to be awakened. This is referring to the same thing about the desire for her husband. The girl gets attached to a guy and even when her friends point out his obvious major flaws (he beats you, he robs banks, he kicks dogs). Even then the girl will say “I know, I know that I should leave him but I, I…then they usually are stuck for a word and say, but I love him. Really what is happening is that they awakened love and this invisible desire has her attached to him. It is tough to get out of that strong pull.
I saw this interesting quote
“Don’t copulate with people you don’t want to fall in love with, because indeed you may do just that”
—–Anthropologist Helen Fisher
That isn’t a quote from the Bible, but it is giving a similar warning. You wake up this desire and you find yourself in a bad situation.
Guys, back to you. This is all the negative side of it. the positive side is this.
If you date the girl and you are the one to say no, or to keep out of situations where you would need to say no, then you have a chance at something great.
If you can say no and make yourself wait, a worthwhile girl will see that as a huge plus. Now if the girl just wanted to use you for some fun, she might question your ability to perform, or your lack of knowledge of how to perform and she might even accuse you of being gay, or undersized. Anything to get you motivated to give her what she wants at that moment.
You are better off not getting involved in that.
But the girl that you can refer to as ‘most beautiful of women’, as ‘the one’; the girl that you want to marry and spend a lifetime with. That girl will be impressed by your self control and will intuitively realize that you will be able to take her to great heights of enjoyment. It won’t turn her off. It will usually increase her interest in being with you physically.
Guys, if you can wait for pleasure, if you can control yourself and keep the physical side of your relationship under control, the benefits will be worth it.
Try going to youtube and searching for the marshmellow experiment.
Got self control ????????